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There Is Nothing To Do On Bermuda

Neither there is anything to do on the way there, and, frankly, not much to busy oneself with on the way back. And if not for the hurricanes, we wouldn't even consider going there on our 25th wedding anniversary—and we hadn't, we actually bought a cruise to Bahamas, and even booked two shore excursions—but NCL just took us to Bermuda instead.

Well, things happen and people have to deal with them.

It would be, however, much easier, if the overall cruising experience aboard Norwegian Spirit left nothing to wish for. Unfortunately, it did.

When it comes to cruising, the entertaining elements of a trip normally fall under three major categories: food, drinks, and shows. Those are supposed to compensate for an imminent boredom of being trapped aboard 13-story floating hotel for several days without even being able to marvel at the occasional car wreck down below from your room window.
I did expect a lot from all three, since Evelyna (and Dar) were on a cruise once, and came back absolutely nuts about how good everything was.

Not this time.
Food, which was all free and awesome on their first trip (Carnival Cruise Lines, not NCL), was simply not good. The ever-crowded buffet selection was mediocre at best, pool-side barbeque was totally inedible, anything above those required a cover charge of at least 15 bucks, sometimes more, and—get this—did not guarantee an outstanding meal. When we were dining at the steakhouse ($25 cover charge), I had to send back my fillet mignon, which was dry as a board (I ordered "medium", I always do), and so on.
Very frustrating.

The performers weren't really impressive neither. The bands (all two or three of them) near-or-below-wedding quality; the magician was OK, the blues guitarist/singer was on a good bar level; the jazz piano player was good and would be even better if he didn't have to sing, but I understand that life isn't fare in general. The so-called "Broadway Show" was horrendous. We left, when they started butchering excerpts from "Moving Out" and fled to listen to family karaoke at the poolside, which was more fun in comparison, probably, because that was the only bar left open that late (midnight).
I do not understand a curfew when it comes to a bars on the ship (or anywhere else, really), but most were closed at 11 p.m. Go figure. And that was pretty much the only quality entertainment left to us, spoiled New-Yorkers...

That covers the ship experience. We had to spend an equivalent of one more ticket price just to maintain a certain level of happiness, which to me is rather important on vacation, and drinks made just about a third of it, the rest was food... make you own conclusions.

They say, it's not where you go on vacation, it's what you are escaping from. That's true, unless it's Bermuda.
I was never a beach/sun/swim person. If you are, you are lucky, because that is the only thing there to do. The beaches are gorgeous, and the ocean is wonderful. The rest is made in China and costs three times as much as the exact same item on Canal street. The toy pink Bermuda bus I bought for my grandson had steering wheel on the wrong side (left of the vehicle, not right as they have it under UK driving rules in real life), if I'd notice it in the store, i'd probably leave it—not that Cass would care, though.

P.S. I bought myself a hat just to have something from the trip. Good for walking dogs under the rain. Made in China.

P.P.S. The part which infuriated me the most—to send an email message from the ship is $3.99. I am so done with NCL...

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